Webster’s dictionary defines modesty as, “the quality of behaving and especially dressing in ways that do not attract sexual attention; propriety in dress, speech or conduct.” Even with this definition “modesty” brings to mind images of plainness, frumpy clothes and overly-religious reserve; all things that the body positive movement is against. For the most part being body positive has meant wearing revealing clothes such as body-con dresses and crop tops, understandably so as plus size women are reclaiming visibility after decades of being taught self-loathing to the point of hiding their body. However, this in turn has made the movement somewhat exclusive as those who chose not to empower themselves in such a way are put down as needing more self esteem and confidence.
May exclaim: “Show those arms! Your figure! Them legs!” Continue reading
Category: Self love
Messages From (26-year-old) Me to (16-year-old) Me
This year my beloved baby cousin turned sixteen. It is just unbelievable to think that just ten years ago this young woman carried my crown down the aisle at my sweet sixteen. Ever since she was born I made a point to be a good role model for her though I know I needed guidance myself half the time. Earlier this month as I celebrated my twenty-sixth birthday, she asked me if I believed my 16 year old self would she be proud of who and where I am today. That random question got me thinking and to be honest, I didn’t have an answer which obviously frustrated my cousin to no end. Yet now as I sit here I thinking about it again, I am pretty sure that my sixteen-year old self would be glad, yet at the same time surprisingly furious at some things. So while I know that it isn’t actually possible for me to go back and speak to my younger self, I decided to make a list of 16 things I would say to her if I did get the chance. I am hoping that these messages also inspires my cousin and other young ladies that are just reaching this milestone.
Spotted Blossoms
This past week I took advantage of the mild temps to finally break out this LC Lauren Conrad knit dress I had hanging untouched in my closet since this last winter. I typically do most of my shopping out of season as that is when the lowest prices can be found. Sure you risk the chance on missing out on pieces you want but you also can stumble upon some unexpected surprises. This dress was no different, being a straight size cut and at 60% off its originally $50 price tag.
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Black History Month and My Afro-Latina Identity
For the entire month of February I have grappled with writing this post. Yet the subject is something that is very important to me and what better way to the end Black History Month than by complicating its annual observance. If you take a look at my “about” page or the bios provided on most of my social media channels for the blog, you will notice that I identify as an “Afro-Latina.” In my experience the term “Afro-Latino” is one that either stumps or angers a couple of people; it usually depends on where you are and who you are talking to. It stumps some people because they are not aware that “Latino” is not a racial category, but an ethnicity, and it angers others because of the misconception that Latinos cannot be Black.
This misunderstanding is one that is sadly shared by Latinos as we generally reference ourselves through our national ties or those of our parents. I grew up understanding that I was the daughter of Panamanian immigrants. Though I was born and raised in the United States, I wasn’t considered “American” by many of my peers as evident from the ever present: “Where are you FROM?” America sees things plainly Black or white and anything that shatters that mentality often brings negative responses. As a result, I was taught to hate my hair, skin color and the fact that my first words were in another language other than English. (I blame the media and the American education system, but that’s a topic for another time.)
Me at 12 years old wearing the Panamanian pollera.
The Best V-day Date Ever
So Valentine’s day is fast approaching. The one holiday of the year where romance, and chocolate automatically come to mind, it tends to have a bit of a negative competitive edge to it with people making a big deal of the fact of who has someone, who is single, who has elaborate plans, and the list goes on. Continue reading
Big City, Curvy Girl, Thin Wallet 