I Am Black and Latina Enough!

I navigate my life by doing two things consistently — explaining and apologizing. It is as frustrating and annoying as you can imagine, yet it becomes necessary when you navigate life being constantly asked which one of your parents are white (the answer is neither) and how someone of my complexion is of Latino descent. In the United States skin color is your only identity so the moment that I enter a room the confusion starts.  Latinos come in various shades as we are the most racially diverse people in the world. As I mentioned in a previous post, this is a direct result of the fact that 95% of the slave trade took place in Latin America and the Caribbean.

Wearing an authentic Panamanian Kuna mola headband my mother bought for me at a Latino Heritage event in Washington DC last month.

Panama, my parents’ native land, even has two significant waves of African/Black migration* that helped shape the culture as we know it today. The first is known as the “Afro-colonial Wave” in which slaves came with conquistador, Vasco Núñez de Balboa as he colonized the land for the Spanish crown during the 16th century. The second is the “Afro-Antillean Wave” which took place around the time that Panama gained its independence from Colombia and West Indian immigrants from neighboring countries like Trinidad, Barbados and Jamaica, came over to build the Panama Canal. As a result you have families like mine where, on my mother’s side alone, we have family members that are Black (as well as being of Jamaican descent), white/European, Asian and Indigenous. I think having racial and cultural mixes like this is actually part of the reason why people have issues with Latinos, because unlike most ethnic groups we are just so diverse that we can’t be categorized easily. Not that we should be doing this at all, but it is a reality, at least in the USA. Continue reading

The Difference Between Surrender and Acceptance

One of the biggest pushes against body positive movement is this idea that those involved with it are promoting/glorify obesity. For some screwed up reason “making an effort” equals thin while being larger is equated to “letting yourself go” or simply “giving up.” Those of us in this body positive/love community, know this is not the case but for those on the outside looking in, this is their only way to understand what is going on.

At the third annual Golden Confidence Pool Party last month.

Continue reading

2017 FFFWeek Day 4 – White Party Cruise

While I took the week off to attend many of the events at Full Figured Fashion Week  I did it knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford to attend the two major signature events, one being the All White Party. Needless to say it was a pleasant surprise and an honor to be given the chance to attend the cruise for the very first time. (Major thanks to Lisa of Mustang Sally Two!)  The “Curves At Sea All White Party” is well known for being the hottest ticket on the FFFWeek event schedule with people even flying in from other countries just to attend.  Brooke and I were so excited we arrived at the pier no less than a full hour before the suggested early arrival time. It worked out for the best though since it gave us time to do a mini shoot by the pier before boarding the ship.

Only Brooke could look like a Goth Goddess in white.

Feeling cute in white summer lace and gold.

Continue reading

Real #SquadGoals

I’ve never been good at making friends. For one thing I come from a conservative religious background that can sometimes make it hard for people to relate to me very much, bu more importantly I suffer from social anxiety. In my mind I couldn’t understand why anyone would want to be my friend. After all, who would want to be friends with someone who doesn’t go out on Friday nights? Someone who struggles with slang and preferred research in the library over shopping?

Growing up, I  made the effort  to be the friend people would want even though the people I befriended didn’t provide me with the friendships I deserved as most of them would take advantage of my generosity for their personal gain. I had conceded to the idea that I just should take what I was given if I ever wanted to have any friends. Looking back it honestly was a subtle form of self-harm (which is not surprising to me given my deliberate self -injury behavior as a teen) that stopped once I met my best friend Jaden* during freshmen year of high school, who really got me out of my shell by encouraging me to  just be myself to the point that started to open up more.

2013 End it Now March Against Abuse and Domestic Violence with 4RWI

Now as an adult friendships are a bit more complicated with the added responsibilities of family and making a living, yet I have found that these mature relationships, especially with women, are more significant as it isn’t about being a part of an “in-crowd” or anything like that, instead it is about  building life-long relationships with purpose. From gaining real world mentoring from the women of 4 Real Women International, INC (4RWI) while working to empower women both in the US and abroad to meeting and collaborating with influencers that I had long admired from my computer, I pretty much a member of quite a few “squads”.  Granted adulting results in people entering different life stages and/or reaching significant milestones at different times that could lead to envy and/or competition, nevertheless, when you meet the right people that is never an issue.
Continue reading

Spring Into Summer Refresh

With Spring  finally breaking through what felt like the longest winter ever (not that I am complaining because I actually love the cold),  I have also gone through some changes. For one thing  I finally got my hair cut  after putting it off for a good eight months, even going so far as to get it cut shorter than last year with a brighter shade of red as a highlight accent. As someone who has always had long hair its been quite the adjustment, but I figure its a new year and a new season so I might as well go all in. Warmer temps and new hair got me in a bit of a shopping frenzy, however in an effort to stay on budget, I have made sure that at least some of my new wardrobe additions actually work to refresh some of my favorite pieces that I currently own and challenging myself even more with different kind of looks that I never would have put together before.
Continue reading