Category: Personal

Reflecting on 27

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2017 was a very interesting year. It marked the year that I turned 27 – the same age my mother was when she made the decision to drop out of college in Puerto Rico to build a life here in NYC. This is also the age she took steps towards creating a family as she also met and later married my father. All of the above are major life events that I can’t even come close to relating to being single and still living in the same city I was born and raised in.

I don’t know if I’m the only one that does this but I think its only natural to look at the path my mother took in order to gain some sense as to where I should “be” at my age. Which is why reaching 27  meant that I should have parts of my life “together” as an adult and yet I found myself feeling like I hadn’t made any real moves. Continue reading →

Let’s Get This Straight! – Natural Curls in the Workplace

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Five years ago when I told my mother I had an interview for an internship position with a renowned fine art and antiquities auction house, her immediate reaction was, “go straighten your hair.” I had really long waist-length tightly curly hair—a gift from my mother’s side of the family—that tends to get a lot of unwanted attention. Though choosing to retain my natural texture for most of my life, I had a love-hate relationship with it- until I realized that my hair wasn’t a curse but something that made me more unique. Maintaining my curly hair was long, tedious process so as a child I often complained about my texture, while my mother was always the one championing  its natural beauty, so hearing her “go straighten your hair” declaration threw me off a bit. What did my hair have to do with my qualifications for the position?

A lot apparently.

2015 Office Selfie

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When Positive Changes Lead to Negative Reactions….

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Time for some real talk – I have hated myself since I was around 6 years old.

That was around the time when three things happened: (1) My parents separated which later led to divorce, (2) My mother, little brother and I ended up homeless for the first time and (3) It was the first time I was told I had to lose weight.  Of the three obviously there are two things on this short list that should hold more weight in terms of importance, yet they all greatly affected my self-esteem, body image and mental health.

These pictures were taken only 4 years apart! Same dress (Kara Lace Dress from SWAK) but different attitude. (Left -2017, Right – 2014)

It wasn’t until I entered my 20s, inspired by the bloggers I followed online, that I decided to look past the qualities that others celebrated and worked on loving the “flaws” I was always told I should make every effort to correct.  I replaced my old wardrobe with new items. I learned to accept compliments. I started experimenting with makeup in ways that I found comfortable. I accessorized more. I cut my hair. Twice, even going shorter the second time. I’ve colored my hair a bold color. By all accounts, I’ve become a different person. Continue reading →

Changing Seasons

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I thought for the longest time about what my final post of the year would be. Originally I thought it would be a collab with one of my blogger babes, Brooke and Jonquel, but then I changed my mind to doing another OOTD. I mean this is primarily a fashion blog after all. But then something happened that made me think about the concept of change and letting go which I find to be very fitting as we are about to enter a new year.

Of all things the things that helped me truly grasp this concept was a recent coat purchase. I know that may seem like a superfluous thing, but hear me out. Continue reading →

Stories in Black and White

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Earlier this month I had the pleasure of attending VoWcon (Voices of Women Conference) as always to be expected from 4 Real Women International, INC. it was a wonderful and inspiring event with a diverse set of honored guests that included Award winning -journalist and Spectrum NY 1 News anchor, Cheryl Wills and Brandi Inez Sutton of the Metropolitan Opera. The theme for the conference this year was all about breaking barriers in all parts of your life and highlighted the need to share your story.

With 4RWI CFO, Angela Fletcher & 4RWI Founder, Norka Blackman-Richards

What made this VoWcon17 even more special was the fact that it was also the book launch of Real Women’s Stories – a powerful, inspiring collection of short stories by and about real women. I had been invited to submit a chapter for this book earlier in the year and it was approved to be included in the published text very soon after I sent my first draft. Ever since I was a kid I’ve had the goal to be a published author so the fact that my first published work is actually a chapter about a personal life experience is pretty surreal, nevertheless I can officially add “author” in my resume while also take pride in the fact that my words may help and inspire someone going through similar challenges to the ones I had.

The books!

As one of the authors of the anthology, I knew I would be expected to attend the conference so back in the summer I had already made plans for an outfit to the point that just needed to find the right shoes for it. However a little less than a week before the event, I was asked by my editor and the 4RWI team to wear white, which worried me because I can literally count on one hand the amount of white items in my closet. With no time to shop I put in my request for my Dia box and got this lovely dress from the new Nanette by Nanette Lepore collection.  Continue reading →